Strong feelings for my same-sex closest friend.

Hi every person, i am hoping you are able to offer some advice, it will be very useful, before we begin i’d like to inform some fundamental information on me personally: i will be male, twenty years old, right, introvert. We’ll you will need to make it not very long.

Okay, and so I know this friend since I have had been 14 in school, he’s a few months older than me personally, in which he is male too, he’s been beside me subsequently, we invest numerous time together and I give consideration to him my closest friend ever, the only person I am able to actually trust essential things about me personally or things we never tell anybody, not really to my moms and dads, we also trust enough to share online services/accounts passwords as soon as we require it, if one of us require a research we did not do, we share it, all those things, you realize. I happened to be very happy to fulfill such a fantastic individual, buddy, I would personally say cousin, i must say i liked being their friend and spending some time with him sharing our hobbies and attempting stuff that is new.

But, a little once I switched 18, we began to notice one thing strange

We started initially to miss him whenever I wasn’t with him, and I also just attempted to ignore it, thinking it had been because we always venture out togheter, play videogames, view movies, etc. But, this is simply not every thing, months passed and I also had this feeling in my own mind, and i’m lonely with him all the time, everyday, all day, I couldn’t stop thinking about him, the more time passed, those feelings became stronger and stronger, to this day, to this very moment I’m writing this without him, I wanted to be closer to him, I wanted to be.

Pay attention, i am maybe perhaps not homosexual, we’m drawn to girls, We have experienced crushes on girls, and dated girls just, but i believe that i am in love with him i can not actually explain this, my emotions for him at this time are particularly strong and deep, it is something i can not invest terms, We have never believed this emotions towards another person prior to, maybe not to be able to make sure he understands the way I feel, is stressing me personally and making me personally unfortunate, why i can not you might ask? Because i’m perhaps not certain that he seems exactly the same, in which he is directly too, in which he might genuinely believe that im gay, strange or that i do want to bang him (that is not the case, We have zero fascination with making redtube asian love with him). Nevertheless, i want to get nearer to him actually, often we fantasy about cuddling, holding fingers, and kissing him on their cheek, but absolutely absolutely nothing sexual, I would like to look after him, head out with him to a supper, or even to view a film, or anyting he wishes, not like we constantly do, instead, if only it might be a lot more like a night out together, a date, because I believe my emotions for him are intimate.

We have tried offering him some clues, like making some jokes about us

Toucing their hands, or offering him a random back massage lol, btw, he wants to provide me personally straight straight straight back massage treatments, really he began that, arbitrarily massaging my straight straight back, mostly my neck, and arms where most of the anxiety is, and I really like whenever he does that, it seems so excellent and relaxes me personally, and I also love the feel of their arms to my straight straight back, now, referring to my emotions. You understand how many dudes are somehow bashful around adorable girls? If they would you like to carry on a date, i am convinced everyone understands the things I’m speaking about, well, recently he’s making me feel a bit nervous/shy whenever I’m around him, simply as us dudes are timid to share with a woman on a romantic date, he’s noticed it and also asked me several times if personally i think ok, or if there will be something wrong with him, i usually react that i am fine, you i am perhaps not, i would like him therefore poorly, become beside me.

For the final component, often he generally seems to just like me too, sometimes don’t, often he makes remarks on what we dress, like “Hey good T-shirt/shoes/etc, it fits you well! ” Or once I changed my haircut he said “Wow, you appear awesome, cool” and that makes me feel dozens of strange feelings blended at that extremely precise minute, often i do believe he does it so that you can see my effect, as he when said that my face switched red (we blushed) after their remark, (and I also do commentary to him too), i prefer just how he dress, along with his body gestures, the way in which he functions, i love everything about him, specifically their character, he’s really the only guy ever personally i think in this manner, no body else, i mightn’t be delighted if he suffers, i’d like only good stuff to take place to him.

I want avice because of this, any allow you to can offer please, should he is told by me the way I feel? If yes, just exactly exactly how when? Am i wrong? Have always been I being selfish? Sorry for that lots of text and concerns, please, if you’re able to offer your opinion, recommendations and any advice, take action, i shall actually enjoy it, many thanks, and sorry for the bad English. (:

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